Grandparent’s Day!
Where do I begin? I love love loved my grandparents. I am who I am today because of each of them. They were four totally different unique individuals that had pasts that made them
who they were. Today is Grandparent’s Day 2019. Honestly, I do not need a designated day to celebrate them. They have all passed away and left me here on this earth, but, someday I will be embraced by their hugs again. Until then, I will celebrate them with each thought, each smell,
each event – whatever sparks a treasured memory in my mind and my heart.
Since today is designated as the day to celebrate our grandparents; I will take a few moments and share about them.
My paternal grandmother was my Nonna. She did not speak English. She passed in January 1969. I have a lovely photo of her. I remember walking into her kitchen and always seeing a large white kettle on the stove. That kettle produced an aroma that warmed my heart. I was a wee little girl, but, I remember the smell of her kitchen. When she was baking it was always a strong anise smell. Every time I smell an anise cookie, biscotti, or candle – memories of her flood me. I was four years old when she passed.
My paternal grandfather was my Nonno. He spoke English and was able to communicate with me. He was a rough looking, Italian man. My memories of him are the cuspidor on the fireplace hearth in their living room. Always being told by family members to stay away from that gold pot! When I was a tad older and realized that gold pot was filled with his tobacco spit – OY!! Thank goodness I never spilled that! I remember the smell of his pipe tobacco and also the smell of his wine cellar. I was down there a few times with him and my uncles – the damp, strange smell. Now I know, as an adult, that was where he made his wine and the mixture of the cool, damp cellar along with the fermentations – well, that was Nonno’s wine cellar. He passed in 1981.
I did not see much of my paternal grandparents, but, I am forever grateful for the Italian heritage I have learned from them. I visit the Calvary Catholic Cemetery where they are buried whenever I am in my hometown. Even though they were not a constant in my life growing up – they are a big
part of me. My Italian heritage that gave me memories to cherish and share with my daughter and someday my grandchildren.
On the maternal side, my Pap-Pap. He left me in 1985 at the age of 67. We had so many things that we had discussed and planned to do – that never happened. Ten years of battling Alzheimer’s disease actually “took him” from me in 1975. His illness progressed and he regressed
quickly. Yet, he taught me to garden, to prune roses, to string wires for grapes, to ride the lawn mower and mow hills without tipping by shifting my weight. I was his right-hand gal when he was working on cars and trucks. He would have me hand him tools when he was working under a
vehicle and laying on a creeper. I learned each tool that way. I helped him dig ditches when his driveway would get washed out. I learned my love of baseball from him. He always said I could be the first female pitcher for the Pittsburgh Pirates whenever we’d sit and watch Jim Bibby
pitch. I asked a million questions and he always answered. He had his faults over the years, but, he was and will always be my Pap. From roses to mechanic’s grease – the aromas spur a memory.
Lastly, my maternal grandmother, Mom-Mom. This lady shaped me into who I am. From cooking, baking, mothering, cleaning, sewing, ironing, more gardening, reading, writing, playing games, event planning for family gatherings, creating and honoring traditions – being a true matriarch of
a family. My Mom-Mom did it all. She loved honeysuckle lotion, I would smell it on her pillows and when she’d walk through a room. She chewed Wrigley’s gum in the white wrapper and always had it in her purse or coat pocket and would hand out a hand-stick whenever I asked. She made
the most perfect iced tea in the summer with the perfect amount of sugar. From meatloaf to potato salad to raisin pie – she was the best.
She always had a hug and kiss for me at bedtime —even as I grew. She told stories of her past and all her struggles that made her the strong, wonderful woman she was. She never failed to answer the zillion questions that I would ask. She loved my love of gardening – she would tell me I could grow anything – even mustard from a mustard seed! She took care of my Pap during his
decade of Alzheimer’s. She took care of everyone. I always wanted to be half the woman she was to make her proud. I was so blessed to have her in my life until 1995. She got to meet my baby girl and spend a few years with her – she loved her dearly. She always said my daughter was so dainty and sweet, and ate like a little bird.
One thing she always reminded me was that I am not to ever save anything for a special occasion. She believed and lived that every day on earth was a special occasion. She wore her favorite perfume and jewelry around the house on days she never went anywhere. Good shoes and clothes were meant to be worn even if only going to the A&P grocery store. The good dishes could be used anytime. She always taught me to celebrate life. She loved birthdays and celebrating them –
she always wanted to be the first to call and wish me a happy birthday. One year she called me at 3:30am when I first moved to Lancaster County, PA — she had to be the first. Those are just a smidgeon of the amazing traits that woman had. A part of me died when Mom-Mom passed away. But, I quickly realized that a part of her lives within me.
I, also, visit the graves of my maternal grandparents when in my hometown. They are buried at Crown Crest Cemetery. I love checking in on their final resting places and clearing weeds and sprucing the area up a bit – I know they are not “there” – but chatting with them at that spot brings a sense of peace and comfort to me.
If you have grandparents out there and do not see them often. Reach out to them …please. You have no idea what it will mean to them – but better yet – you have no idea the impact that will have on you. Life is short. Family gatherings are becoming a thing of the past. Family reunions are no longer a priority. Social media can assist with keeping a connection between loved ones – but there is nothing as great as human touch and face-to-face conversations. Take photos – create memories that can be shared with your children and grandchildren. Be the one to start a new
tradition ….a family legacy is a gift that no one can take from you.
Honor your grandparents … they are a major part of your very being.
Embrace their past …..as it helps shape your future.
Life in Words 